Bedtime with multiple kids when you are able to tag team with a partner can be busy and exhausting.
However, doing bedtime with multiple kids on your own can be straight chaos.
I have three kids, all 3 and under, and many nights a week my husband does not get home until after bedtime. When I had my third baby, I was very overwhelmed with the task of bedtime by myself. All of the kids are great sleepers and go to bed independently, but conquering the bedtime routine alone still seemed daunting.
Dinner and anything afterwards always seems to be a challenging time for small kids. You’ve probably heard of it referred to as the “witching hours”.
At my house, this is the time of day when my daughters are getting tired. They are ready to calm down, get in the bath, are ready for bed, and typically want a lot of me — all to themselves. It can be hard juggling my 6-month old wanting to be held and my 18-month old wanting a book and then, of course, my 3-year old who wants attention.
It can feel overwhelming.
Managing Bedtime with Multiple Kids On Your Own
by McKenna Linford, Senior Sleep Consultant
I am going to share 3 tips that can help you get through bedtime on your own successfully with as little tears as possible.
NOTE:
These tips are to be used assuming your children are already sleeping through the night and able to put themselves to bed independently. If that is not yet the case for your little ones, you are in the right place! We’d love to help — just set up a discovery call to learn more about working one-on-one with us here.
Tip #1: Gather Everything You Need Ahead of Time
This might seem simple but it always makes my life so much easier during the hours after bedtime.
As I am putting my kids down for their naps, I will pull out their PJs, diapers, diaper cream, sleep sacks and whatever else they may need for bedtime. (Multiple sleep sacks are always a good idea.) I set their towels out by the tub and make sure their favorite bath toys are ready to go. I have a hair caddy with a brush and detangler that I make sure is out by their PJs. I also set a clean bottle out for my youngest baby.
The key is to have everything you need accessible so you are not wasting time on the hunt when the kids all need your attention.
a little bit of our nighttime routine:
After dinner, my girls know we go straight to the bath (no need to do this every night, this is just what works for us). They love the bath and enjoy playing together in it. I have a chair next to the tub and while the older two play, I feed my 6-month old. I love this time with her where I can feed her and bond with her while the other two are right by us, happily playing.
Once baby girl is done eating, I bathe her. (Feeding her before the bath ensures there is no feed-to-sleep association.) I have also found brushing teeth in the bath is the best time for us. All kids are contained and I can get it done right there in the bathroom.
Then, one by one, I get them out of the tub and into their PJs.
Tip #2: Block Them In
I block my kids in one room — meaning, I shut the door in my room and have a few toys in there for them to play with while I take turns getting each of them dressed, hair combed out, etc.
Before I started doing this, they would run crazy all over the house as soon as one was out of the tub. This would leave me trying to get a diaper on one child while chasing down my 3-year old who just wanted to play tag. I was exhausted from trying to keep up. Kids were running everywhere and getting riled up and I was frustrated.
Keeping them all in one room for most of the routine has really helped. Make sure to keep some books or small toys to entertain them while they wait for their turn.
Tip #3: Give the Oldest Child an Opportunity to Help
After everyone is ready for bed, we finish our bedtime routine. I invite my 3-year old to help read 2 books to the babies. She usually picks one that is short and she has pretty much memorized. This makes her feel important and helpful and I love watching the kids interact.
Then we say our prayers and my 3-year old helps get her sisters into their sleep sacks. This part can take a few more minutes, but allowing your older kids to help will pay off in the long run, I promise! (Starting the bedtime routine early can allow more time for small things like this so that you don’t feel rushed.)
I make sure to praise her and thank her for her help. I want her to be excited about getting the babies to bed. I have learned that the more I praise her for her help, the more she is willing to do. Having an extra set of hands — even if they are a toddler’s — can be awesome!
She then helps me sing her sisters a song (she usually chooses her favorite Disney song) and then we put them to bed.
After the babies (6 months and 18 months) are in bed, I have an hour or so of alone time with my 3-year old. This is when we have found it is best to have our one-on-one time. She leads the way. Sometimes she chooses to color; sometimes she plays with toys; we may read a book; or we may just have a snack and talk.
We make it a goal to do at least 20 minutes to fill her attention cup.
Then she usually continues to play while I get the dishes done. My goal is to have the house picked up so that when she goes to bed, I can relax and get ready for bed myself.
And that’s it!
To My Fellow Parents On Your Own at Night:
I hope you found these tips and the sharing of our routine was helpful, especially to you parents who are on your own at this time of night. I know it can be a challenge, but I promise you, all the little things can really help your night go smoothly!
If you find you need some guidance in creating a routine for your child — or you need your child to start sleeping independently in the first place — give us a call to learn more about working one-on-one together. We would love to help you.
Not sure if you need to work one-on-one but need guidance?
Check out our digital course → The Murray Method for Babies
All team members have completed training with Kelly and have learned the Murray Method. Kelly continues to support, guide and oversee the Sleep Squad as they work with the families who trust in us. That way, all clients will experience the same amazing results (and lots and lots of sleep) regardless of who supports them.
Sweet Dreams
Kelly Murray is a certified sleep coach and an award-winning pediatric sleep consultant based in Chicago offering sleep coaching services nationwide.
