Once I had my son sleep trained, bedtime was a breeze. My husband and I felt like we really nailed this sleep thing and we were total pros.
Then suddenly I found that I was expecting baby #2 and I wondered…
How am I going to navigate bedtime for both of them??
How to Navigate Bedtime Solo with Multiple Children and Differing Routines
by Jade LiManni, Master Sleep Consultant
Perhaps you, too, have experienced this conundrum. And if you, too, are like me, perhaps you find yourself not just navigating bedtime for two, but also doing it solo.
A lot of times my husband travels for work; maybe your partner travels for work or they work long hours. Or maybe they just have something going on with friends, and its inevitable: you're going to run some bedtimes solo.
I think every parent does at some point and it can cause a lot of stress and anxiety for a lot of parents.
We panic over “How am I going to get everyone to sleep on time?? What if the baby doesn't go down??”
Having experienced this over a year and a half myself, I have learned some tips and tricks along the way that I want to share with you to make navigating bedtime for multiple kiddos more manageable, less daunting, and most of all, take some of the stress out of the equation.
Tip #1: Ensure Your Kiddos Are Falling Asleep Independently
My #1 tip for this scenario is that you really want to make sure that all your children are able to fall asleep without your assistance. The last thing you want to do is have to sit in a room rocking your younger child for 30 minutes to get them to sleep while your toddler's off doing who knows what in the other room.
I've even had families say, “Yeah, I have to lay with my child, so the baby and I go and lay for 45 minutes with the toddler until they fall asleep, and then I take the baby out, nurse them and try to get them to bed.” I can only imagine that if those scenarios are happening, just how much more stress and anxiety that it will cause when bedtime has to be run solo.
If your kiddos aren’t falling asleep independently, we can help you with that! Schedule a discovery call with one of us. We would love to work with you to get your kiddos to fall asleep independently without any props.
Tip #2: Do Your Prep Work
The more that you can prepare and set up your children’s sleep environments ahead of time, the more it’s going to help you. It's going to set the mood, it's going to let your children know that it's bedtime, and it’s going to make it easier for you so that everything is ready when bedtime comes
In each room, make sure all of the following are complete and ready:
blackout covers are sealed and closed
PJs are laid out
any nighttime diapers or pull-ups are out
any creams or lotions are out
table lamps are on to dim the rooms, making it more conducive for sleep
Do all of these things ahead of time so that when bedtime comes, you're not having to look for anything. Everything is set up, ready to go, and it'll make it a breeze for you.
Tip #3: Consolidate Any Way You Can!
The last thing you really want to do is think about what you can consolidate for multiple kids. Think of ways you can do less but make it more impactful.
For my kiddos, we were always doing multiple baths; one for our older child and one for our younger child. We really like to have a bath in our bedtime routine, as it helps produce melatonin, it helps set a calming environment, it's consistent, and it serves as a cue for sleep. I love that bath is in my children’s bedtime routine — but I don't love to do two baths every night. So, we decided to have our kids take a bath together. (My kids are 4 and 1½ so this still works.) They really enjoy it, they love playing together in the bath, and I only have to do one!
Continuing with the theme of consolidation, I then take my daughter out and blow dry her hair while my son gets a little more time in the bath. This way, he gets to play a little more rough and rowdy if he’d like (more splashing for sure) while I’m there supervising. When he's done with that, I put him in his towel and have him come into the baby's room with me. He usually sits while I'm putting PJs and lotion on for my daughter and then he will actually read the bedtime story with us. We all sit in the chair and we read one story.
I thought this was a genius hack — because my son gets three bedtime stories at night (and sometimes they can be very long stories), this bedtime story with the three of us counts as a story! So then we only have two left after that. We read a story together, he says goodnight to his sister, and it also helps support that family unit. Everyone's saying goodnight, sweet dreams, giving kisses — another cue for them to know that sleep is coming. I put the baby down, and all that's left for my son is PJs and his last two books.
For us, it really helped to consolidate some of those things and set the sleep environment ahead of time so that it's not so chaotic.
Don’t Let Sleep Slide
Let me know if these tips help you! I think bedtime can cause a lot of stress and anxiety in all situations for many, many families. That's why you're here, right? Because you're looking for tips and success for getting your kids some quality sleep and in turn, to get yourself some quality sleep, too. And that is OK!
Sleep is important and you should value it and definitely set yourselves up for success — and I hope that this blog post helps you do just that.
Not sure if you need to work one-on-one but need guidance?
Check out our digital course → The Murray Method for Babies
All team members have completed training with Kelly and have learned the Murray Method. Kelly continues to support, guide and oversee the Sleep Squad as they work with the families who trust in us. That way, all clients will experience the same amazing results (and lots and lots of sleep) regardless of who supports them.
Sweet Dreams
Kelly Murray is a certified sleep coach and an award-winning pediatric sleep consultant based in Chicago offering sleep coaching services nationwide.
