False Start Bedtimes

Why does my baby wake up 30 to 60 minutes after they fall asleep at bedtime?

By Melissa Bramwell, Senior Sleep Consultant

What Is a False Start?

Ahhh, you let out a deep breath..

It’s 7:30 pm and your baby is down for the night. You sit down on the couch with your significant other and turn a movie on to watch. You are finally letting your body rest after a long, long day. Then, you hear it…. you hear your little one start crying furiously. 

How can this be?!

It has only been 30 minutes since she went to sleep at bedtime. You quickly rush into the room to get her back to sleep. After trying everything to get her back down… it doesn’t happen for an additional hour. You are exhausted and at your wits end.

So… what’s the deal? 

Your family has experienced a false start at bedtime. This is when your baby wakes 30-60 minutes after you put them down for the night or completes one sleep cycle. In some cases, they may not fully get through that first sleep cycle. Together, we will talk about some causes of this false start bedtime.

Tip For Babies Under Four Months

We commonly see this in babies who are under four months. I’m going to let you in on a little something… are you ready for this?!

Younger babies need a later bedtime. Babies younger than four months need a bedtime of 8-10pm. You may be wondering, how do you find the perfect bedtime for your little one?

Bedtime is the longest stretch of sleep you will get once you put them down for the night. If your two month old wakes 30 minutes after you put her down at 7:30, she treats that sleep time as a nap. It was not a true bedtime.

That is okay!

You learned valuable information. Now, you know that their bedtime is closer to 9pm. Great job, mama.

As your baby gets closer to 5 months, bedtime is going to shift and be closer to 7 or 8pm.

 

Are You Using the Right Wake Window

If your wake window is off, one of two things can happen. 

1. The wake window isn’t long enough: so, your baby can fall asleep at nap/bedtime but they don’t have enough Adenosine, aka, sleep pressure to stay asleep. Affter a short period of time, they are up again. 

2. Your wake window is too long. Your little is becoming overtired. Their body is trying to fight that fatigue so they end up producing more Cortisol. The high levels of Cortisol can cause multiple night wakings.  

It truly is a balancing act of finding that perfect window for your child. Below, l have a helpful guide showing wake windows for different ages.

Take a look to see how your current wake windows compare.

 

Avoid Drowsiness During the Bedtime Routine

We have all heard it: put the baby down drowsy but awake. I am here to let you know… THIS. IS. FALSE.

We want your baby to go down 100% awake. That can seem strange at first but trust me, it is going to make things so much easier for you!  Drowsy is the first stage of sleep, so if you are helping your baby get into that first stage, they are not sure how to connect to the next sleep cycle.

Let me break it down.

There is a brief waking at the end of a sleep cycle where they are checking their surroundings to make sure it is the same as when they fell asleep. When they briefly wake, they notice mom (or dad) is not rocking them anymore. It is startling and they need you to help get them back to sleep.

NOW. I’m sure they make themselves loud and clear. I hear ya, it is exhausting when your little babe is reliant on a sleep prop. My biggest advice is to look into sleep training.

There are different methods for sleep training, so look into what will be a good fit for your family. This is going to help your whole family get the rest that they need. 

Note: You are able to help newborns get drowsy. They are not developmentally ready for sleep training and need some assistance.

 

Establish a Consistent Bedtime Routine

We all thrive on consistency. Your baby is no different.

The sooner you start a consistent routine, the sooner your baby will pick up on these sleep cues. A good length for the routine is 30-45 minutes. It can be very simple, don’t overthink it.

Here is an example: 

  • Feed

  • Bath 

  • Massage/lotion

  • PJS

  • Books

  • Sleep Sack

  • Songs

  • Sound Machine

  • In crib 100% awake

 

Practice Independent Sleep

If your baby is relying on sleep props, your sleep troubles may linger longer than you’d like. Practice putting your sweet babe to sleep 100% awake with no rocking, feeding or holding to sleep. I know, it seems scary.

That is where we come in. We offer a variety of different packages. From an online course, to the online course with some virtual support from a consultant, to working directly one on one! We know that it seems intimidating and we want to make this transition go smoothly for your family. 

A tip for independent sleep: If your baby wakes up after one or two sleep cycles, give them 5-10 minutes before tending to them. See if they are able to connect the next cycle and put themselves back to sleep! You may be pleasantly surprised. :)

 

All team members have completed training with Kelly and have learned the Murray Method. Kelly continues to support, guide and oversee the Sleep Squad as they work with the families who trust in us. This way, all clients are able to experience the same amazing results (and lots and lots of sleep).

Sweet Dreams…

Kelly Murray is a certified sleep coach and an award-winning pediatric sleep consultant based in Chicago offering sleep coaching services nationwide.